I can barely believe...

It's weird, in a very very VERY good way, to have these memories.

And to have my smile back... one that is very easy to recognize if you know what to look for, even though most don't - it makes me happy to HAVE that smile again.

I had it when I had my piercings, and I have it now.

---

It makes me sad though... that that smile may come at the cost of a friendship. That friendship may have been over before - or at least was deeply harmed - but now?

And then again, how does one define a friendship? Is what Dylan and I had a friendship?

Bleh.

---

The smile though... the memories that I can barely believe are memories.

The thoughts in my head that I cannot wait to try in real life.

With a person that yes, I trust.

I will hurt from this, in some way or another, because that is how the world works. I have hurt from it already.

And yet,

I SMILE.